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 The first round of the AdNation Paintball Tournament is fast approaching, and team details are coming in at the double.
Most teams opted to send through a brief list of names – which can be found here
– but the Memac Ogilvy PR team went all-out on their player bios.
Unfortunately, they went so all-out, there’s not room on the main paintball page for all the descriptions. But seeing as the Memac team clearly put so much effort in, we were loath to let them go to waste.
So here, in all their glory, are Memac Ogilvy’s player biographies. Teams : be scared. Be very scared.
Memac Ogilvy has clearly thrown down the gauntlet here, so if any other paintball participants want to up the ante,
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The “Ogilvy Mafia” crew
Ann: As a Public Relations consultant for a well known oil company, Flanagan developed her mad commando rolling skills after she was captured by Columbian rebels on a media visit to her clients R&D headquarters. Held hostage for eight years in the jungle, she was often forced to write mind-numbingly boring press releases for the rebels in their effort to raise their brand awareness and paint them in the image of misunderstood school boys who couldn’t grow facial hair and had never been given the opportunity to captain a little league baseball team.
Finally escaping her captivity by pretending to be dead, using a finally tuned skill of breathing through her tear ducts, Flanagan’s pallid skin, long, thin hair, and scars on her skin from chains are hard-to-erase signs of her years in captivity. “I’ve got mad skills,” she said.
Melanie: What would any of the world’s armies have done without the Schmudel? They would’ve fought on the wrong side, they would’ve gotten lost on the way to the battleground and would’ve shot themselves instead of the enemy. “The Organizer” is part of the team to ensure Swiss precision is intact. She may look innocent, however looks are deceiving....SHE IS LETHAL!
Maen: Was a an active member in the Military forces of Tanzania for 6 years. Had developed manifestations of disorders of neurons that are not properly classified as a primary muscle disease. It's a new breakthrough of hyper muscle activity on Maen's left finger and right thumb sky rocketing his remote reflexes. Over the years, stacks of metal-like composed atoms at nanoscale thickness formed on his “trigger fingers”......
He cannot keep from pressin the button, He will take you down... no chances.. no mercy.. "Hell is on its way"
Fouad: Vietnam, Iraq, jbaa, mrosti, kfarkatra [we assume these latter three are real places – Ed]... and now in Garhoud...
“Home! Sweet home!” Back again!!!! Heads up... “I'm All In”
Alaa: His parents used to call him TITO... His friends called him the HULK... Descending from the ‘Civilised’ nation of the Barbarians, Alaa is a brutal, cruel, insensitive and warlike person. Close combat is not an option ‘Barbarian remember??!!’ Height: 190cm, Width almost the same, Alaa's blade is dry so if you know what's good for you keep awaaaaaay!!!
Hamza: When people open cans of whoop ass...Hamza Bukhari jumps out. The chief export of Hamza is “pain”. There's no chin behind Hamza’s beard...only another fist. He’s ten feet tall, weighs two tons, breathes fire, spits venom and could take a shotgun blast standing. If Superman and the Flash were to race to the edge of space, do you know would win? Hamza Bukhari....
Rama: Coming from the centre of LA, Rama Alsayegh is the most sought after Public Relations consultant in Hollywood. Hung out with Clooney, Pit and Jolie, Oprah, Rama was living a life of glamour and parties. Until one day, Alsayegh was abducted by the “Ogilvy Mafia” and she was nowhere to be seen around. Because of her phenomenal PR skills, Alsayegh was captured by Ogilvy PR to kick ass!
Rama might be a posh, glamorous, hard to please chick, but Hollywood made her a warrior at heart! BEWARE!
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